Heckling Houdini

You can unwrap all the monies

You can mark all the cards

You can free the pigeons from the magician's sleeve

You can blame it all on swamp gas

Or some aerial balloons

When the streets are full of black cats and a sense of deja vu

But when they carve your name in marble

And they're digging up the sod

Remember heckling Houdini is the prelude to tempting God

Monkey's paw and a tell-tale heart

And the tyrant's head served a la carte

Explain away the monsters 'neath your bed

When you've stowed away in a sailor's chest

On a boat they call Marie Celeste

You'd better hope the fishes are all well fed

Cuz you don't scoff at thunderclouds

When you hold the lightning rod

And heckling Houdini is the prelude to tempting God

"It's all a trick

It's all a fake

These charlatans are on the make"

Laugh and sneer til tears run down your face

"You country rubes

You've been deceived

You hopeless boobs you still believe

Let's run these scoundrels out of this place"

When they close the lid and snap the locks

To saw the lady in the box

What if she really screams

"Oh God it's really real"

Professor, do you stop and stare?

They ask "Is that your wife up there?"

As the sawdust all turns red

How do you feel?

Well it's quite a show, you must admit

So stand up and applaud

Cuz heckling Houdini is the prelude to tempting God